Woo! Well, we had practice tonight... however is was sans Gourley cause I forgot to call him and he made plans to clean up his house before the relatives showed up. But Todd, MCB and Ian showed up. And quite frankly, it was a good practice I think especially considering how few we have had in the past month or two. We rammed through all the new songs. I was a bit tired after that. Man, I really, really need to practice more. Then we went through the last set list from High Five minus a few songs. Ian's got a thing against Chicken Nuggets Of Sin. Not sure why, but don't count on hearing it at the next show... it prolly ain't gonna happen. Anyways, like I said, we went through the old set list and, darn it, it sounded pretty good. I screwed up on Cereal and Beer. It's a song I wrote and I still got totally lost. DOH!
I'm hoping now that I can convince my Dad not paint this weekend. I'm going to be out of town on Sunday so that would cut things a bit shorter than I think he would like. I know he wants to get it done and honestly so do I, but I really haven't had any down time with the band or by my lonesome for that matter. I usually require a couple days a week to just veg or do whatever I want to do and I really haven't had time to do that recently, which adds a bit to the little fits of depression you've been seeing. Work still stinks but I have a little better idea of what they want out of me. They've loosened the reins a little bit which is good. I still have a million things on the horizon there, but it's doesn't feel as pressing as it should... whatever that means. Basically, I realy do have a lot to do, but somehow I know that I'll get it done in time... as long as I get motivated, which recently has not been the case.
Well folks, I really need to get to sleep... so until next time... later! Hope to see you at the next show!!! (whenever that may be ;)
-------------------Darrin
Wednesday, November 21, 2001
Sunday, November 18, 2001
I'm tired.
I'm really tired of being sick. I'm tired of my head throbbing when I bend over to tie my shoes.
I'm tired of politics. Both in the world and at work. I don't like the fact that some people can just whine a bunch, or on the opposite end, do nothing, and get their way. It's all bullshit. Just because they want things 'their' way or to make a point, regardless of how much it burdens those around them.
I'm tired of leaves. They fall off the trees and then I need to pick them up. Now, some my argue that Mother Nature made leaves to cover the ground and protect the grass and all the jazz. Tell that to all my neighbors. Tell that to my dad. I was informed just today by my dad that I still needed to weed the front of the house. I can counted them... there are five. I figure, they are going to perish in the cold most likely. Maybe I am ill informed, and I probably am. Grass doesn't die in the winter, it just goes dormant. I guess weeds would be the same way. But, jeez-o-weez, they aren't going anywhere. They don't bother me any.
I'm tired of laundry. I wish that they just magically stayed clean and wrinkle-free. I think I saw a shirt like that back in the 70's made by Ronco. I think it may have even come with the smokeless ashtray.
I'm tired of my stained gray carpet. I really need to borrow my friends steam cleaner.
I'm tired of only knowing a handful of guitar chords. Now, I might be a drummer, but I know my way around music, or at least I think I do, and nothing frustrates me more than not being able to figure out a song that I can hear in my head. The same goes with lead guitar. I just can't do it right now. I just don't think that my hands are wired for that. They only want to go 'bam bam bam' and not '1-3-4-2-1-3-4-2-1-3-4-2-5-2-3-4'
I'm tired.
---------------
I really shouldn't be allowed to write in my blog when on meds. I shouldn't be allowed to function at all in society for that matter. I get all pessimistic and shit and bring everything down around me. Down. Down. Down. Comma-comma-down-doobie-do-down-down.
Later 'Tater.
I'm really tired of being sick. I'm tired of my head throbbing when I bend over to tie my shoes.
I'm tired of politics. Both in the world and at work. I don't like the fact that some people can just whine a bunch, or on the opposite end, do nothing, and get their way. It's all bullshit. Just because they want things 'their' way or to make a point, regardless of how much it burdens those around them.
I'm tired of leaves. They fall off the trees and then I need to pick them up. Now, some my argue that Mother Nature made leaves to cover the ground and protect the grass and all the jazz. Tell that to all my neighbors. Tell that to my dad. I was informed just today by my dad that I still needed to weed the front of the house. I can counted them... there are five. I figure, they are going to perish in the cold most likely. Maybe I am ill informed, and I probably am. Grass doesn't die in the winter, it just goes dormant. I guess weeds would be the same way. But, jeez-o-weez, they aren't going anywhere. They don't bother me any.
I'm tired of laundry. I wish that they just magically stayed clean and wrinkle-free. I think I saw a shirt like that back in the 70's made by Ronco. I think it may have even come with the smokeless ashtray.
I'm tired of my stained gray carpet. I really need to borrow my friends steam cleaner.
I'm tired of only knowing a handful of guitar chords. Now, I might be a drummer, but I know my way around music, or at least I think I do, and nothing frustrates me more than not being able to figure out a song that I can hear in my head. The same goes with lead guitar. I just can't do it right now. I just don't think that my hands are wired for that. They only want to go 'bam bam bam' and not '1-3-4-2-1-3-4-2-1-3-4-2-5-2-3-4'
I'm tired.
---------------
I really shouldn't be allowed to write in my blog when on meds. I shouldn't be allowed to function at all in society for that matter. I get all pessimistic and shit and bring everything down around me. Down. Down. Down. Comma-comma-down-doobie-do-down-down.
Later 'Tater.
Friday, November 16, 2001
Someone please kill me now. I am sitting here at work and coughing every 20 seconds. I must be driving everybody else nuts... cause Lord knows I'm driving myself nuts.
Don't you hate impossibilities? I know I do. I am stuck here working on a problem that seems impossible. With that attitude I guess I am already defeated. But what I am working on is insane. Think of it this way: Take the music of Dokken, Fiona Apple and Snoop Doggy Dogg and break them down into their musical elements of instruments and the notes those instruments play. Now, write an application that looks at all those pieces and can successfully shuffle all the pieces from each one of those songs around and make the noise that comes out sound something like Dave Brubeck. That's what I am faced with. And the people where I work are convinced it can be done. And I am convinced this is something that is going to be far more difficult to do. There is no magical application that can do this. There is no silver bullet. There is no end to pi, you fuckin' morons.
-cough-
20 seconds
-cough-
20 seconds
-cough-
Now, I understand that the medication I am on is going to fuck with me, not that I need any help, my Id does quite well on its own of doing this. But I am feelin' under the weather, shitty, tired and all that jazz... and I am a bit on the sarcastic and pessimistic side as well. Where does that put me??? In the middle of hell.
---------Darrin
Don't you hate impossibilities? I know I do. I am stuck here working on a problem that seems impossible. With that attitude I guess I am already defeated. But what I am working on is insane. Think of it this way: Take the music of Dokken, Fiona Apple and Snoop Doggy Dogg and break them down into their musical elements of instruments and the notes those instruments play. Now, write an application that looks at all those pieces and can successfully shuffle all the pieces from each one of those songs around and make the noise that comes out sound something like Dave Brubeck. That's what I am faced with. And the people where I work are convinced it can be done. And I am convinced this is something that is going to be far more difficult to do. There is no magical application that can do this. There is no silver bullet. There is no end to pi, you fuckin' morons.
-cough-
20 seconds
-cough-
20 seconds
-cough-
Now, I understand that the medication I am on is going to fuck with me, not that I need any help, my Id does quite well on its own of doing this. But I am feelin' under the weather, shitty, tired and all that jazz... and I am a bit on the sarcastic and pessimistic side as well. Where does that put me??? In the middle of hell.
---------Darrin
Did I mention that I hate being sick? I went to the doctor yesterday cause my throat was a little sore. I figured about anything could go wrong with me at this point. And I was right. Seems I have a sinus infection as well. Gotta love it.
I returned to work today, only to be referred to as 'Pinky'. In my head, I assume they are talking about the mouse and accept it. Narf! Maybe I'll take over the world someday.
And what the hell was Steve Bellisari thinking? Obviously he was thinking 'Hey! -hiccup- I can make it home before the cops catch me.' **Screeeeeech!!!** That's right buddy. Pull attention to yourself. And run that stop sign while you're at it. I'm getting blamed for this at work as well. Seems that for the the two Saturdays I was gone, the Buckeyes were showing a little glint of actually being a decent football team. Then I return from my cruise, sans luggage but with conjunctivitis and sinus infection and the whole thing goes to hell in a handbasket. Somehow, this whole thing is my fault. Can't quite figure that one out, but I do have to admit that the coincidence of it all is damning evidence.
And other thing, I think Portishead (not PorpoiseHead) is pretty darn cool. I had a few MP3s from the 'Dummy' album playing the other day... and it's just good stuff. Another band that I like that is very similar to this is Comet 9. Now, as far as I know, they only put out one album called 'Like Mercury'. I got it out of the 99 cent bin at Singing Dog. It had all this weird aeronautical diagram stuff going on so I figured that the music would be decent... and it was.
I think the decongestants they had me on are making me a little bit loopy. Not happy loopy, just loopy. And my head still hurts. Oh well.
I was going to mention something else, but I can't think of that right now. Stream of conscious is a bitch sometimes.
And I hope Ian does write that cool-ass album he was talking about. I know the whole creative slump thing all too well. My creative output outside of DevilCake is almost non-existent. Only recently have I been picking up my guitar and noodling around. I contemplated doing a concept album called 'Peddletones' where that would be mainly what I was incorporating throughout the whole album. (If you don't know what a peddletone is, ask Ian) But then I thought, GOD that would probably be AWFUL.
Hmm... ambient. Ian sent me an example of ambient music. Something by Mr. Fripp. Honest too goodness, I don't know the difference between ambient and new age. Maybe there is no difference. Maybe they are one in the same or one of them is a sub-group of the other. All I know is after listening to that, that my ambient album is NOT ambient. I guess you can chalk it up as 'experimental' or something totally non-descriptive, but I guess that's what it is. You might see it coming out on Bizarre Depictions... then again maybe not. It's an awfully hard listen. Should only be taken in small doses. Two songs at a time at the max.
Well, I don't want to be late getting back to work. I can't stand having to work in that hole past 5 pm, especially when I am bored off my gourd.
L8r dudes!
----------------Darrin
I returned to work today, only to be referred to as 'Pinky'. In my head, I assume they are talking about the mouse and accept it. Narf! Maybe I'll take over the world someday.
And what the hell was Steve Bellisari thinking? Obviously he was thinking 'Hey! -hiccup- I can make it home before the cops catch me.' **Screeeeeech!!!** That's right buddy. Pull attention to yourself. And run that stop sign while you're at it. I'm getting blamed for this at work as well. Seems that for the the two Saturdays I was gone, the Buckeyes were showing a little glint of actually being a decent football team. Then I return from my cruise, sans luggage but with conjunctivitis and sinus infection and the whole thing goes to hell in a handbasket. Somehow, this whole thing is my fault. Can't quite figure that one out, but I do have to admit that the coincidence of it all is damning evidence.
And other thing, I think Portishead (not PorpoiseHead) is pretty darn cool. I had a few MP3s from the 'Dummy' album playing the other day... and it's just good stuff. Another band that I like that is very similar to this is Comet 9. Now, as far as I know, they only put out one album called 'Like Mercury'. I got it out of the 99 cent bin at Singing Dog. It had all this weird aeronautical diagram stuff going on so I figured that the music would be decent... and it was.
I think the decongestants they had me on are making me a little bit loopy. Not happy loopy, just loopy. And my head still hurts. Oh well.
I was going to mention something else, but I can't think of that right now. Stream of conscious is a bitch sometimes.
And I hope Ian does write that cool-ass album he was talking about. I know the whole creative slump thing all too well. My creative output outside of DevilCake is almost non-existent. Only recently have I been picking up my guitar and noodling around. I contemplated doing a concept album called 'Peddletones' where that would be mainly what I was incorporating throughout the whole album. (If you don't know what a peddletone is, ask Ian) But then I thought, GOD that would probably be AWFUL.
Hmm... ambient. Ian sent me an example of ambient music. Something by Mr. Fripp. Honest too goodness, I don't know the difference between ambient and new age. Maybe there is no difference. Maybe they are one in the same or one of them is a sub-group of the other. All I know is after listening to that, that my ambient album is NOT ambient. I guess you can chalk it up as 'experimental' or something totally non-descriptive, but I guess that's what it is. You might see it coming out on Bizarre Depictions... then again maybe not. It's an awfully hard listen. Should only be taken in small doses. Two songs at a time at the max.
Well, I don't want to be late getting back to work. I can't stand having to work in that hole past 5 pm, especially when I am bored off my gourd.
L8r dudes!
----------------Darrin
Wednesday, November 14, 2001
I fucking hate being sick. I get back from the cruise and what do I do??? I get sick. I got that pink eye shit. I stayed home from work today to spare the folks at work.
I originally had a whole shit load of stuff written, but then I read my mail (while doing my blog) and stupidly clicked on a fucking link. So instead of a cool ass blog, I now have a fucking Journey song stuck in my head. Thanks Ian, you punk-ass-mo-fo.
Anyways, in short, it basically said:
1) I hate being sick
2) I miss the band
3) I hope the DC boxset comes out soon
4) I wished we played more than one gig every three months
5) I need to be more proactive in the band as far as getting gigs and shit.
The original blog was better, but hey, it's just a bunch words.
I'm tired so I go rest a little bit. peas.
----------------Darrin
I originally had a whole shit load of stuff written, but then I read my mail (while doing my blog) and stupidly clicked on a fucking link. So instead of a cool ass blog, I now have a fucking Journey song stuck in my head. Thanks Ian, you punk-ass-mo-fo.
Anyways, in short, it basically said:
1) I hate being sick
2) I miss the band
3) I hope the DC boxset comes out soon
4) I wished we played more than one gig every three months
5) I need to be more proactive in the band as far as getting gigs and shit.
The original blog was better, but hey, it's just a bunch words.
I'm tired so I go rest a little bit. peas.
----------------Darrin
Monday, November 12, 2001
Well sonofabitch! Look who's back. Yup, it's me. Just to inform you ... the best part of this entry is the last half... so just shut up about how long this entry is and start reading. The sooner you stop your bitching, so sooner you can start reading and finally get to the good part.
So how are all of you doing? Me? I'm doing swell. I just got back from my cruise to the Caribbean. Now originally I was supposed to be going to the Eastern Caribbean, however Hurricane Michelle had plans to completely destroy San Juan, so the crew on the ship thought better and did a 90 degree turn and headed to Cozumel. The sea was a bit rough. Even though the ship weighs a 100,000 tons or something insane like that, it was still getting tossed about in the 18 to 20 foot waves. In fact, the only time the boat wasn't rocking back and forth was when we were docked at a port or when we arrived in Miami yesterday. Normally it is not like this, but Hurricane Michelle and another tropical storm that was flying around out there made it for rough seas. Only the first two days were really bad. I didn't do so well with that, but I bit my lip and said "Dammit, I am on this cruise to have and dammit I'm gonna" then took an Advil and sucked down another Coca Cola.
Cozumel was pretty cool. I took a tour to the Mayan ruins on the coast. This was one of the very few sunny days that we actually had. On the way back to the ship I got to drink some Mexican beer... and not that fucking Corona or Dos Equis bullshit. This was simply called "Sol" and it wasn't too bad. (As I am writing this, my body is still swaying a little bit. It's funny how the body adjusts itself to make you feel more comfortable. I just wish someone would tell my brain that I am on land now and there's no reason to try to compensate for the moving of the boat that isn't there.) After we got back from the tour, my friends and I went shopping. Yee-friggin'-haw. My friend's wife was set on finding a Tanzanite ring. I guess it's some rare purple stone that is supposedly only found in one place Africa and the mine they were using just collapsed and they are not sure how much more they will be able to mine... blah blah blah. So most of they day me and Brad sat in the chairs and looked at some of the decent looking scenery looking at jewelry and walking up and down the street.
Next was Ocho Rios, Jamaica. I took a plantation tour which kinda sucked. They drove us around on a wagon with seats using a Ford tractor. We looked at banana trees, coconut trees and even saw this dude climb one without a ladder or anything else... just legs and arms. Well lah-dee frickin' dah. Then we went to Dunn's River Falls. That was fun. Basically you started at the bottom of the falls and climbed back up. Now it's not a big ol cliff or nothing. It's on a slope. Lots of water. I can't say much else 'cause that's all you really do. But trust me, it was fun.
Then we went to the Cayman Islands. I took a snorkeling tour. Now you need to understand that the last time I went snorkeling I almost drowned. I'm not a good swimmer and lord help me if you want me to float or tread water. I'm not doggie paddle only, but not far from. Anyways, I was really nervous about going. But this time I had a life vest (as did everyone else). The minute I jumped in I started to panic. Everything that went wrong was happening again. I got was in my snorkel, I started coughing, I was kicking my legs too much and was having trouble breathing only through my mouth. I was about 3 seconds from truing right around and getting on the ship and saying fuck it. But then I said "Dammit! I came here to friggin' snorkel and I am going to do just that. I have a life vest on (which I didn't have the first time) and I am not going to drown!" So I stuck my face into the water and there were all these fish swimming by. And I was calmed. I slowed my breathing down and everything was fine. At one point I was following this group of 100 or 200 bright blue fish. They would swim for a while, then stop at a section of coral and start eating something and then move on. It was alot of fun. The rest of the time was spent on the boat wandering around, going to on-board art auctions, karaoke bars, piano bars and the casino.
=== the good part ===
It was a good time... until we landed back in Miami yesterday. So we get off the boat in an 'orderly' fashion at 11:00. We were supposed to start getting off the boat at 9:00am. Keep reading, it gets MUCH better. We go into this warehouse where they took all of our luggage. I find one piece of my luggage at the front of the warehouse and the other at the very back. Note that I put them in the hall together and I assume they loaded them together. So how the fuck did they end up 200 fucking feet apart? I don't know either.
A little more background before I continue. I was travelling with 3 other people: one person who roomed with me and another couple who had a room 6 floors above us. One the ship, they let people off in sections based on where their room was in the ship... and they higher you go in the ship, the nicer the rooms, the more money involved, the sooner the rich motherfuckers want to get of. I was on the first floor. You figure out who got off the ship first. We (my roommate and I) figured on this and anticipated on meeting them at the airport.
So after I find all my luggage, I go outside and wait for a bus... for an hour and a half. Seems that 3 other Carnival cruise ships landed at exactly the same time. Take 4500 people and throw them in front of 20 buses (which aren't marked in any way and there isn't anyone from the cruise line or the bus line) and are supposed to be going to two different airports (Miami and Ft,. Lauderdale). Now image the chaos. My flight was leaving at 2:00pm. It was now 12:30. No problem I think. I still have an hour and a half to get my bags checked and board the plane.
I walk into the terminal and it is wall to wall people. The line for USAir counter is miles long. So I get in line and wait, fairly patiently. Fifteen minutes pass and I really haven't moved much. I'm getting a little bit anxious. One hour and fifteen minutes before my flight leaves and I'm standing in a line that's moving WAY to slow. And USAir knows it two. There were scores of other people that had already missed their flight and even more that weren't fortunate enough to get another flight out... they were all booked up, leaving by my guess-timate a couple-a-hundred people stranded in Miami for the day until they could get a flight out tomorrow. But I still had a chance.
Now the porters were coming in and asking if people wanted to check their bags with them... for a small fee of course, but at this point in the game, you really don't care. So we catch a porter, he takes our tickets to check them first. He comes back and says "Sorry. I can't take your luggage. You are marked for the random security check. You have to stay in line." Fuck. So we wait. We're finally just inside the ropes. Only 100 feet more to go... and that's quite a ways. As I am standing there, I hear this lightly spoken man asking people if they are on Pittsburgh Flight 270... my flight and starts pulling them off to the side to start processing them exclusively to get them on the plane. After checking out the situation (I asked a few people in the short line if they were going to Pittsburgh. They said yes.) So I yank all my luggage and get into the Pittsburgh line, losing my place in the long line. It is now 1:30pm. Again, I have a 2:00pm flight AND I know that I have to go through the whole security thing where they search my bags. The soft-spoken man, now slightly yelling says "If I did not pull you out exclusively, I will not acknowledge you." And then he repeats. This is the point where I lose it. I scream, "Listen, I am on the Pittsburgh flight, I need to get on that plane." And he says, "No, you listen, if did not pull you out exclusively, I will not acknowledge you."
I'm at a loss now. Frustrated, I go to the end of the long line, almost to the same spot I was 45 minute ago when I first showed up. It was at this point I asked my friend, "So, what do think of Miami. It looks like were staying here." (By the way, I wasn't the only one who was getting this. There were about 10 other people who were rejected as well. USAir is totally in panic mode and changes their mind. It is 1:45pm now. Remember, 2:00pm flight and I still have to go through the security search. I get to the security room (which USAir is sharing with Delta) and there are only two checkers, one for Delta and one for USAir. And there is a MOUND of luggage, all for Flight 270 to Pittsburgh. The USAir people are on their walkie-talkies telling other people to hold the plane because there are still 10 people and 30 bags that need to get checked. I of course am on the list and DEAD LAST. And it continues. It is now 2:15pm. Remember, this is a 2:00pm flight and many people (me included) have a connecting flight waiting for them in Pittsburgh to take them to their final destination.
"The captain is wondering if he is clear to take off"
"No! We still have 7 passengers and 20 bags to check."
2:30pm
"The captain is asking how much more time."
"We still have 4 passengers and 10 bags to check."
2:45pm
"We really need to be leaving. How much more time?"
"We have 2 passengers (me and my friend) and 3 bags."
They clear us to get the hell out of their and that they would make sure the luggage got to Pittsburgh. At 2:50pm, we get on the plane, which is now sweltering hot. Remember, the air conditioning does work well in a plane unless it is moving. Well, at least I'm on a plane for a 2 1/2 hour ride to Pittsburgh. Recall, that I have a connecting flight waiting in Pittsburgh. I originally had a 45 minute layover. However, by my calculations, my connecting flight will be taking off about the time that my current flight lands. I wasn't far off.
After landing in Pittsburgh, I took 4 steps off the plane and heard... "Final boarding call for Flight blah blah blah to Dayton." Shit. I am at gate A13 and I need to get to B41. Do the math... it's not close. So I walk very very very quickly. My shins and calves are burning. Ouch ouch ouch ouch. Each step hurts. FINALLY, I get to the gate just as my other friends are boarding. Thank goodness. And I jump on the plane and am on my way to Dayton. Now you would think that the story ends here... but it doesn't.
I'm going to speed the story up a bunch, skipping most of the details. It goes something like this.
We arrive in Dayton and go to the baggage claim. Waiting. Waiting. Waiting. Didn't I see that lime green suitcase already. I don't see my luggage. Off to the courtesy desk. "Your baggage didn't make it. But we will get it to you tonight... somehow, someway. Address please." We hop in the very empty minivan and stop at McDs. We're all a bit hungry since we haven't eaten since 8:00am and it is now 7:30pm. Driving home ... "Houston, we have a problem. My car keys... are with my luggage that is lost and not in my carry-on". I parked my car in my friend's driveway (back home in Anna, an hour and a half away from Columbus), blocking their good car. Hmm... Well, I could borrow my parents car, drive back to Columbus and get the spare car keys from out of the house, drive back to Anna and move my car. Wait, my house keys are with my car keys. DOH! Oh wait, my parents have a set of keys. But it's Sunday at 8pm and they go to the movies alot on Sundays. Are they even home? I call home. They're there. I explain my predicament. My dad, hearing the news from my mother, exclaims "You've got to be kidding me!" Thanks for caring, dad. (In his defense he has been under a tremendous amount of stress and had starting watching 'Saving Private Ryan' which hit a little to close to home for him since he was in the military)
So me and my friends get into the car with the hopes of transporting my frustrated ass back home to ma and pa where I can procure a car from them for the evening. In the car, turn key... Rrrr Rrr.... -click- My friend's wife had left the cell phone plugged into the cigarette lighter. Battery dead. The other car (the one I am blocking) in in the car as well. Will the cables reach? They do. The car starts. I am driven to my parents. My dad, now much calmer and understanding, drives me to Columbus. I run into the house, with my carry-on and grab my car keys. I also turn up the heat and feed the fish, then jump back in the car and head back to Anna. My dad drops me off at my friend's house, I get in my car and drive back to my parents house. With it being 11:30pm, I am tired so likely I am going to sleep there. Now you would think that the story ends here... but it doesn't.
As I enter into the house, I come to the realization that I left my carry-on bag in Columbus. In that bag was all the stuff I need for my contacts, my brush, my razor, my deodorant, my toothbrush and my toothpaste. Luckily, I have all those things at their house. What a day.
Now... the story is done.
Glad to be back and I hope the the gang can get back together and jam tomorrow or Wednesday!!! Peace outside!!!
-------------------Darrin
So how are all of you doing? Me? I'm doing swell. I just got back from my cruise to the Caribbean. Now originally I was supposed to be going to the Eastern Caribbean, however Hurricane Michelle had plans to completely destroy San Juan, so the crew on the ship thought better and did a 90 degree turn and headed to Cozumel. The sea was a bit rough. Even though the ship weighs a 100,000 tons or something insane like that, it was still getting tossed about in the 18 to 20 foot waves. In fact, the only time the boat wasn't rocking back and forth was when we were docked at a port or when we arrived in Miami yesterday. Normally it is not like this, but Hurricane Michelle and another tropical storm that was flying around out there made it for rough seas. Only the first two days were really bad. I didn't do so well with that, but I bit my lip and said "Dammit, I am on this cruise to have and dammit I'm gonna" then took an Advil and sucked down another Coca Cola.
Cozumel was pretty cool. I took a tour to the Mayan ruins on the coast. This was one of the very few sunny days that we actually had. On the way back to the ship I got to drink some Mexican beer... and not that fucking Corona or Dos Equis bullshit. This was simply called "Sol" and it wasn't too bad. (As I am writing this, my body is still swaying a little bit. It's funny how the body adjusts itself to make you feel more comfortable. I just wish someone would tell my brain that I am on land now and there's no reason to try to compensate for the moving of the boat that isn't there.) After we got back from the tour, my friends and I went shopping. Yee-friggin'-haw. My friend's wife was set on finding a Tanzanite ring. I guess it's some rare purple stone that is supposedly only found in one place Africa and the mine they were using just collapsed and they are not sure how much more they will be able to mine... blah blah blah. So most of they day me and Brad sat in the chairs and looked at some of the decent looking scenery looking at jewelry and walking up and down the street.
Next was Ocho Rios, Jamaica. I took a plantation tour which kinda sucked. They drove us around on a wagon with seats using a Ford tractor. We looked at banana trees, coconut trees and even saw this dude climb one without a ladder or anything else... just legs and arms. Well lah-dee frickin' dah. Then we went to Dunn's River Falls. That was fun. Basically you started at the bottom of the falls and climbed back up. Now it's not a big ol cliff or nothing. It's on a slope. Lots of water. I can't say much else 'cause that's all you really do. But trust me, it was fun.
Then we went to the Cayman Islands. I took a snorkeling tour. Now you need to understand that the last time I went snorkeling I almost drowned. I'm not a good swimmer and lord help me if you want me to float or tread water. I'm not doggie paddle only, but not far from. Anyways, I was really nervous about going. But this time I had a life vest (as did everyone else). The minute I jumped in I started to panic. Everything that went wrong was happening again. I got was in my snorkel, I started coughing, I was kicking my legs too much and was having trouble breathing only through my mouth. I was about 3 seconds from truing right around and getting on the ship and saying fuck it. But then I said "Dammit! I came here to friggin' snorkel and I am going to do just that. I have a life vest on (which I didn't have the first time) and I am not going to drown!" So I stuck my face into the water and there were all these fish swimming by. And I was calmed. I slowed my breathing down and everything was fine. At one point I was following this group of 100 or 200 bright blue fish. They would swim for a while, then stop at a section of coral and start eating something and then move on. It was alot of fun. The rest of the time was spent on the boat wandering around, going to on-board art auctions, karaoke bars, piano bars and the casino.
=== the good part ===
It was a good time... until we landed back in Miami yesterday. So we get off the boat in an 'orderly' fashion at 11:00. We were supposed to start getting off the boat at 9:00am. Keep reading, it gets MUCH better. We go into this warehouse where they took all of our luggage. I find one piece of my luggage at the front of the warehouse and the other at the very back. Note that I put them in the hall together and I assume they loaded them together. So how the fuck did they end up 200 fucking feet apart? I don't know either.
A little more background before I continue. I was travelling with 3 other people: one person who roomed with me and another couple who had a room 6 floors above us. One the ship, they let people off in sections based on where their room was in the ship... and they higher you go in the ship, the nicer the rooms, the more money involved, the sooner the rich motherfuckers want to get of. I was on the first floor. You figure out who got off the ship first. We (my roommate and I) figured on this and anticipated on meeting them at the airport.
So after I find all my luggage, I go outside and wait for a bus... for an hour and a half. Seems that 3 other Carnival cruise ships landed at exactly the same time. Take 4500 people and throw them in front of 20 buses (which aren't marked in any way and there isn't anyone from the cruise line or the bus line) and are supposed to be going to two different airports (Miami and Ft,. Lauderdale). Now image the chaos. My flight was leaving at 2:00pm. It was now 12:30. No problem I think. I still have an hour and a half to get my bags checked and board the plane.
I walk into the terminal and it is wall to wall people. The line for USAir counter is miles long. So I get in line and wait, fairly patiently. Fifteen minutes pass and I really haven't moved much. I'm getting a little bit anxious. One hour and fifteen minutes before my flight leaves and I'm standing in a line that's moving WAY to slow. And USAir knows it two. There were scores of other people that had already missed their flight and even more that weren't fortunate enough to get another flight out... they were all booked up, leaving by my guess-timate a couple-a-hundred people stranded in Miami for the day until they could get a flight out tomorrow. But I still had a chance.
Now the porters were coming in and asking if people wanted to check their bags with them... for a small fee of course, but at this point in the game, you really don't care. So we catch a porter, he takes our tickets to check them first. He comes back and says "Sorry. I can't take your luggage. You are marked for the random security check. You have to stay in line." Fuck. So we wait. We're finally just inside the ropes. Only 100 feet more to go... and that's quite a ways. As I am standing there, I hear this lightly spoken man asking people if they are on Pittsburgh Flight 270... my flight and starts pulling them off to the side to start processing them exclusively to get them on the plane. After checking out the situation (I asked a few people in the short line if they were going to Pittsburgh. They said yes.) So I yank all my luggage and get into the Pittsburgh line, losing my place in the long line. It is now 1:30pm. Again, I have a 2:00pm flight AND I know that I have to go through the whole security thing where they search my bags. The soft-spoken man, now slightly yelling says "If I did not pull you out exclusively, I will not acknowledge you." And then he repeats. This is the point where I lose it. I scream, "Listen, I am on the Pittsburgh flight, I need to get on that plane." And he says, "No, you listen, if did not pull you out exclusively, I will not acknowledge you."
I'm at a loss now. Frustrated, I go to the end of the long line, almost to the same spot I was 45 minute ago when I first showed up. It was at this point I asked my friend, "So, what do think of Miami. It looks like were staying here." (By the way, I wasn't the only one who was getting this. There were about 10 other people who were rejected as well. USAir is totally in panic mode and changes their mind. It is 1:45pm now. Remember, 2:00pm flight and I still have to go through the security search. I get to the security room (which USAir is sharing with Delta) and there are only two checkers, one for Delta and one for USAir. And there is a MOUND of luggage, all for Flight 270 to Pittsburgh. The USAir people are on their walkie-talkies telling other people to hold the plane because there are still 10 people and 30 bags that need to get checked. I of course am on the list and DEAD LAST. And it continues. It is now 2:15pm. Remember, this is a 2:00pm flight and many people (me included) have a connecting flight waiting for them in Pittsburgh to take them to their final destination.
"The captain is wondering if he is clear to take off"
"No! We still have 7 passengers and 20 bags to check."
2:30pm
"The captain is asking how much more time."
"We still have 4 passengers and 10 bags to check."
2:45pm
"We really need to be leaving. How much more time?"
"We have 2 passengers (me and my friend) and 3 bags."
They clear us to get the hell out of their and that they would make sure the luggage got to Pittsburgh. At 2:50pm, we get on the plane, which is now sweltering hot. Remember, the air conditioning does work well in a plane unless it is moving. Well, at least I'm on a plane for a 2 1/2 hour ride to Pittsburgh. Recall, that I have a connecting flight waiting in Pittsburgh. I originally had a 45 minute layover. However, by my calculations, my connecting flight will be taking off about the time that my current flight lands. I wasn't far off.
After landing in Pittsburgh, I took 4 steps off the plane and heard... "Final boarding call for Flight blah blah blah to Dayton." Shit. I am at gate A13 and I need to get to B41. Do the math... it's not close. So I walk very very very quickly. My shins and calves are burning. Ouch ouch ouch ouch. Each step hurts. FINALLY, I get to the gate just as my other friends are boarding. Thank goodness. And I jump on the plane and am on my way to Dayton. Now you would think that the story ends here... but it doesn't.
I'm going to speed the story up a bunch, skipping most of the details. It goes something like this.
We arrive in Dayton and go to the baggage claim. Waiting. Waiting. Waiting. Didn't I see that lime green suitcase already. I don't see my luggage. Off to the courtesy desk. "Your baggage didn't make it. But we will get it to you tonight... somehow, someway. Address please." We hop in the very empty minivan and stop at McDs. We're all a bit hungry since we haven't eaten since 8:00am and it is now 7:30pm. Driving home ... "Houston, we have a problem. My car keys... are with my luggage that is lost and not in my carry-on". I parked my car in my friend's driveway (back home in Anna, an hour and a half away from Columbus), blocking their good car. Hmm... Well, I could borrow my parents car, drive back to Columbus and get the spare car keys from out of the house, drive back to Anna and move my car. Wait, my house keys are with my car keys. DOH! Oh wait, my parents have a set of keys. But it's Sunday at 8pm and they go to the movies alot on Sundays. Are they even home? I call home. They're there. I explain my predicament. My dad, hearing the news from my mother, exclaims "You've got to be kidding me!" Thanks for caring, dad. (In his defense he has been under a tremendous amount of stress and had starting watching 'Saving Private Ryan' which hit a little to close to home for him since he was in the military)
So me and my friends get into the car with the hopes of transporting my frustrated ass back home to ma and pa where I can procure a car from them for the evening. In the car, turn key... Rrrr Rrr.... -click- My friend's wife had left the cell phone plugged into the cigarette lighter. Battery dead. The other car (the one I am blocking) in in the car as well. Will the cables reach? They do. The car starts. I am driven to my parents. My dad, now much calmer and understanding, drives me to Columbus. I run into the house, with my carry-on and grab my car keys. I also turn up the heat and feed the fish, then jump back in the car and head back to Anna. My dad drops me off at my friend's house, I get in my car and drive back to my parents house. With it being 11:30pm, I am tired so likely I am going to sleep there. Now you would think that the story ends here... but it doesn't.
As I enter into the house, I come to the realization that I left my carry-on bag in Columbus. In that bag was all the stuff I need for my contacts, my brush, my razor, my deodorant, my toothbrush and my toothpaste. Luckily, I have all those things at their house. What a day.
Now... the story is done.
Glad to be back and I hope the the gang can get back together and jam tomorrow or Wednesday!!! Peace outside!!!
-------------------Darrin
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