Ah ha! He finds the answer!
SPAM!!! Tabasco Flavored no less!
It comes out of the can. He is amazed that it holds the same shape in the can as it does out of the can. 'Amazing!', he things. But that is a large piece of meat. the wife made a bounty of delicious pancakes this morning and he is surely not THAT hungry.
The answer is: Cut it in half. In his hunger-crazed eyes, his center cut is a bit off.
The husband finds his way to the fridge and pulls out his favorite beer: Shiner Bock. 'Mmmm, beer!', he thinks. With beer, meat and a spatula in hand, he heads outdoors to the mighty grill.
The husband fires up the grill and places the slabs of meat on the grill. The aroma makes his hunger grow. To take his mind off the pains, he walks around to inspect the new gutters that were installed that Friday. 'Boy! They sure do look good! Leaf Gutter rules!', he thinks.
Out front he spies a rabbit feasting on some grass. The eating rabbit reminds him of his food on the grill.
Luckily, the meat is cooking nicely. He flips the slabs o Spam and lets them cook til there are nice char marks on it.
After 15 minutes, he is satisfied and plates the larger piece of Spam (about a 1/2 lbs worth) on a bun. 'Mmmm... time to eat!', he thinks.
Mouthful after mouthful of wonderful Tabasco Spammy goodness enters the husbands mouth. Finally, he is full. He puts away his dishes and goes outdoors to do manly things like mowing the lawn and washing the car.